Hear me say it again, there is no perfect. Sometimes we hold ourselves to such high expectations that when we can’t reach them every single day, we feel like we failed. All too often we get caught up in what we haven’t accomplished, what we haven’t achieved, what we haven’t done right. This leaves us in a failure mindset. It can happen to any of us at any time. Sometimes life happens and we get caught in these self-defeating cycles; sometimes we just have a shift in our mindset and we find ourselves stuck there.
The important thing to remember is everything is temporary. The hard times are temporary. The sad days are temporary. The “I can’t take anymore” moments are temporary. Just like the fun is temporary. Maybe that sounds like a terrible thing to say- that the fun doesn’t last forever, but we all know it’s true. The fun has to come to an end and we have to get serious and deal with what’s in front of us. But those fun moments, those moments when we feel the most love we’ve ever felt, where life feels like it couldn’t possibly get any better…those moments come and go. The important part to remember, is when they go, they come back because nothing lasts forever, including the bad times. The good ebbs into the not-so-good; just like the sad ebbs into the best.
On our darkest days, we must remember, the sun always rises. The dark doesn’t last forever. Though there are times when our minds play tricks on us, making it feel like it’s nearly impossible to find our way out of the hole we feel we are in, stand still for a moment and remember, before you were in the hole, you had moments when you were on top of the world. Search for those hands that are reaching out to you to pull you up; push aside the hands that want to hold you down. Remember, everything in moderation. A balanced life is built on acceptance…or maybe expectation…that the bad days are just as fleeting as the good days; we just tend to feel the bad days so much deeper and so much longer.
Challenge your mind each day to remind yourself that bad days, no matter how long they’ve lasted, will not last forever. If you find yourself believing the bad will not end; this is your mind playing tricks on you. Maybe you’re experiencing depression or anxiety, which are very real conditions that can be difficult to challenge alone. There is no shame in seeking support- from a healthy friend/family member, or from a therapist who can support you support you through those days that feel insurmountable. None of us deserve to be alone on our toughest of days.
Written by: Dana Hicks, LCSW
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